Every second counts

By Simon Wright – Follow me on Twitter @Siwri88

The month of July is full of milestones for me, both in a good and bad way. They range from the anniversary of my graduation to recently, completing a full year in my full-time role in the publishing industry.

Of course, nothing’s ever perfect in life. Some aim for total perfection but it simply isn’t possible. And this particular month brings back some painful memories which will always remain forever.

It is an incident I don’t like to talk about, largely because it makes me emotional. After much deliberation, I have decided not to go into detail about what actually happened to me on the evening of 23 July 2009. What I will say though is it changed who I was and the proof that every second really does count in life.

Luck on my side

Those close to me personally will know what happened. It was an incident that really shook my confidence. On the night of Thursday, 23 July 2009 – my life could well have ended. I’m not exaggerating either. It was a truly terrifying ordeal and there wasn’t much I could have done when it was taking place. It is at these points and I’m not a religious person where you want the Lord to be looking down on you and ensuring no great harm is done.

I suffered relatively light injuries (that’s if you put a broken nose in that category). In the days afterwards, I had never felt so shaken up, terrified of what might happen next. I was in-between the transfer of finishing college to starting University. I was moving into Halls of Residence in Northampton in less than seven weeks’ time and here was a massive hurdle that was now in my way. I became tense and scared of even leaving home. So, the days afterwards were some of the hardest I’ve ever had to go through. Gradually though, it would get better.

I admit I am very lucky to even be here today. So, I know that but I’m encouraged to have progressed so much since.

That hasn’t come though without needing to make some changes.

No more risks

I think that what happened has made me more of a cautious individual, particularly when it comes to taking risks or a chance that could backfire. I have never been a massive risk-taker anyway but you don’t appreciate the consequences of what could happen if things go wrong. That’s just something that doesn’t need to be factored in.

It has perhaps made me more reluctant to commit to certain aspects of life but if it is what keeps me secure, then it is hardly a crime.

For sure, I became a safer person. There was a period where I would enjoy going out, hitting the nightclubs and having a few too many drinks. Then I would somehow stumble home and not quite remember how that happened. Now, I don’t take those chances anymore. I still like to go out, but I’m more likely to have a few drinks in a bar and have a giggle with some of my close friends rather than go clubbing. Those regular days ended with what happened and while there were still occasions of this at University – only the nights out in the Balestra nightclub in Northampton felt anything truly special. I would always go and have a good time, but remember to get home safe and know I’ve done that too. I’m happy I took this route – it was just a shame something bad had to happen for me to realise this.

The real life lesson

Five years is a long, long time and the fear that was built around me slowly started to come down as the end of summer 2009 approached. I’m thankful the University adventure was when it was. The move to Northampton came at the right time, a great opportunity to make a fresh start.

Physically, I’m okay and emotionally, it is tough to talk about it but when someone asks, I will give brief details. The days afterwards, I got some fantastic support from the people I valued and respected. Friendship is an important part of my life – right up there with family values and for me, much more than a relationship.

Mentally though, the scars of that night will probably always be there. It is not something that can totally be forgotten. It might be the case for 360 days of the year but in the week leading up to the date, it becomes a bit more difficult. I would be lying if I said the incident hasn’t been replayed in my head but luckily, that is only in rare circumstances.

The real life lesson out of it though was the general appreciation of what life is all about. It was something I told one of my closest friends from the college days around a fortnight afterwards and that was; ‘every second of my life is precious now.’

Make the most of the time available to you

And it has been too, both in the good memories and even the moments where things haven’t gone according to plan. Every second counts in life. Always cherish those special moments and make the most of what is available because no-one knows what is around the corner. The unexpected really is the unexpected.

Since then, I am a journalism graduate, a full-time worker in one of my preferred chosen fields, freelance journalist and successful blogger and been on many journeys since, from holidays in Fuerteventura to visits to the Olympic Park in Stratford, the home of British motorsport, Silverstone (twice) and a VIP tour of Wembley Stadium. And I know that if things had gone slightly different five years ago – none of that might have been possible.

So, every second is precious. Don’t waste time – who knows what will happen next.

Categories: 2009, Changes, Five, Friendship, Incidents, July, Life, Milestones, Risks, Seconds

The UoN Experience - Year Two: Trials and Tribulations

By Simon Wright – Follow me on Twitter @Siwri88

As the second anniversary approaches which signalled the end of my education life and the finale to my journalism degree at the University of Northampton, I have decided to share my own personal experiences from my three years at UoN. This includes a look at some of the nightlife memories, a critical assessment of the video products I produced and my insight into each of the three years I had in what was my second home.

Next is the middle year of my degree. In 2010-11, the UK celebrated a Royal Wedding, then suffered days of rioting in the summer. Barack Obama successfully managed to capture the world’s most wanted man and England’s cricketers actually won an Ashes series in Australia. For me, this was a rocky year but I survived it and learned a lot from the difficult times to make me a stronger individual.

After a break of some three months, second year began at the University of Northampton in late September 2010 and it was fair to say that it was a sluggish start for yours truly. This would turn out to be the biggest character test I had endured in my education history. It led to me nearly walking away from it all in the spring of 2011 and ultimately ended with my first ever A grade in exam conditions.

With my Halls of Residence contract ending, I had to look quickly for new accommodation for second year in Northampton. Luckily, I found a room similar to my first year environment in a building called Sunnyside – owned by YF Properties in January 2010. I quickly signed a rental agreement and moved in eight months later. Sadly the early weeks were punctuated by regular cutouts of the electrics in the building. I was unfairly blamed by some of the other stayers who believed one of my electrical products was causing the faults. That hurt because you know deep down when you’ve done something wrong and when you haven’t. It took around three weeks to solve, with the movement of a fridge freezer in my room to help ease socket pressure, but it turned out to be a faulty hairdryer in another area as the cause. After that, I (pictured below) elected to keep myself to myself throughout my two years in Sunnyside as I had more important issues and that was passing my degree.

Smiling through a tough start to second year, which turned into a bumpy ride

However this didn’t help my settling in phase into second year and meant I couldn’t fully concentrate in the early weeks. I also wasn’t happy with the spilt of the course that saw me separated from almost everyone I had been close to in first year. Whether it was planned is not for me to answer but it did start a tempestuous relationship with many of the lecturers throughout second year.

The one person I hadn’t been spilt up from was another female who would play a huge role in both my development as an individual on the course and a friend away from the assignment pressures. I had got to know Tamika through first year but not in the way I did throughout the next two years. Tamika became a very close friend of mine. We were in all the same module classes and I had great fun being around Tamika and with another lad in the form of Shane. We were in the lengthy six-hour workshop sessions on a Tuesday morning and quickly formed a friendly partnership in group projects. Tamika and Shane were big players in perhaps the funniest project throughout my three years at UoN. Tamika and I were asked to do an exercise on sound prep for the Film Style & Technique module in October 2010. What followed was a hilarious two-minute piece of drama, superb acting and ‘The Maskman,’ played by Shane. We only revealed his identity about six months after the piece went online on YouTube!

I continued to work with Tamika throughout the year and alongside two other journalism colleagues, Chris and Parris, we produced a short but fantastic five-minute documentary on issues of car parking for students at University. It had a perfect balance from student concerns on the issue to the way the University could deal with the problem. Tamika and I did the camera work, the production folder and the editing, Chris and Parris were the main people who carried out the interviews. I was so proud of this project when completed – and tops the list of video work throughout the course.

Whilst the friendship I had with Tamika went from strength to strength, I wasn’t feeling so good on the inside. When I had to film the opening of a new manufacturing company in the Brackmills Industrial Estate of the town on my own, it was the catalyst to a huge meltdown as winter gradually turned towards spring. After relaxing and not studying during Reading Week (there’s a lesson for all future Uni students), slacking off on my return to lectures, the charger to my laptop stopped working and then a furious argument with a fellow colleague, I came so close to going home back to Milton Keynes and not returning. I wasn’t in the right frame of mind and I’m happy to admit I was on the verge of a breakdown. I’m an individual who often takes things to heart and therefore, this can lead to huge uncertainty. I questioned if I was good enough for the Uni course – even thinking of going because I was a distraction to others around me.

Having felt zapped of morale, confidence and happiness, I was ready to pack up and go when I saw the videos of the horrendous tsunami that hit Japan in March 2011. As a trainee journalist, I really felt for everyone affected by something so devastating that Mother Nature could throw up. I then realised that here I was feeling so low just about a laptop charger breaking and a petty argument when others worldwide had lost everything through no fault of their own. If I had gone through with it and walked away, it would have been a massive mistake. A weekend back in home comforts helped, and I returned with a new belief and also a relaxed, rather than stressed approach to the workload.

Before all that, the entire journalism intake had undertaken a press day for the first time as a group magazine was put together for Christmas in 2010. On the day itself (the final Friday before Christmas), it was sheer and utter chaos but organised chaos in that. With the hard work of the whole course, plus the knowledge and experience of senior lecturer Hilary Scott, we got a Unique Xmas magazine online and there was an element of both pride and relief. Hilary only began lecturing with our group from second year and she was an excellent motivator and lecturer. If you worked hard, she would appreciate it and if you got on the wrong side of her, your life would be made a misery. I think that was a good element. While I’ve never liked harsh criticism, I also appreciated what Hilary would do for some of my weak design work. Rather than paper over the cracks, she’d tell me face up if it was utter rubbish and I could start again by improving. She did that with most of us. In second year, Hilary was the only lecturer who I felt I could communicate with in a fair and dignified way and it is a shame that we are no longer in contact.

As deadlines approached, nightmares began. I was on track and never really had problems with meeting deadlines in good time, although some assignments wouldn’t be without their troubles. The eight-page magazine I did in second year was so close to failure. It was a pitiful attempt and highlighted my dreadful design talents. If you saw it, you’d come to the conclusion that a 10-year-old could do better! Others had left things a bit tighter and with computer servers crashing and not being sorted instantly just added to the pressure. On top of that, there was a Law & Government exam to prepare for. MB5, which was the main work room for journalists became a second home for most of us. All it needed was some sleeping bags, a kettle, toaster and microwave and it probably would have converted into a sleeping hut! So when everything was handed in, it was pure joy for all of us. I was so proud of the group in general. We had come together and helped each other out in those final weeks and battled against the lecturers in almost a mini mutiny. All of this happened in the midst of one of the hottest April months on record too.

I put a lot of preparation into the Law & Government exam – although with other various projects going on, I couldn’t solely focus on this as much as the first year exam. I went into the tense atmosphere of exam conditions in a confident manner, perhaps the most I’d ever been. Usually in exams, my brain froze and I didn’t perform. This time, it was all different. I felt I had done well, but I was stunned when the results came back and I had achieved an A grade! Surely it was a mistake…Simon Wright getting an A grade in exams is about as likely as the United Kingdom ever winning the Eurovision Song Contest again! It did happen though, perhaps more by fluke than good nature but it is on the results record so I won’t be swapping it for sure.

With lectures, workshops and presentations completed by mid-May, it was then out on the town for a proper celebration with my course (more in the nightlife chapter). The year wasn’t quite finished though. In July, I went to London to undertake a two-week work placement with Runners’ World Magazine, one of the many publications under the National Magazine Company. It was such a valuable and useful experience of how a publication works (on a monthly basis in their case). I enjoyed it, even if the commuting was a bit of a tricky. I was incredibly lucky to get this placement and I think it put me in good spirits that I could work well in an office position which is what I now have today.

So that was second year done and dusted. Two-thirds of the course done, just 33 per cent to go and now it was crunch time. Second year at the University of Northampton had taken me to the brink and back but I had succeeded and it was time for a decent summer break and a family holiday in Fuerteventura before the joys of my final academic year in education – season 2011/12.

Categories: Accommodation, Degree, Documentary, Friendship, Government, Journalism, Magazine, Parking, University, University of Northampton

Me 2013 - A year of two halves

By Simon Wright – Follow me on Twitter @Siwri88

IN this annual piece 12 months ago, I came up with this final sentence.

“I do hope 2013 is a little bit less dramatic and a bit quieter though!”

Wishful thinking then as it has been another action-packed 12 months for me. However as the festive season gathers pace, I can finally say I’m settled, secure and happy for the first time in ages. It was a year where I had to deal with personal tragedy, knockbacks in job searching and changes in both technological devices and friendships but when I think about my 2013 – I feel satisfied that the hard work has paid off.

The closest I will probably ever get to Sebastian Vettel!

That wasn’t the case at the start of the year. An underwhelming trip to the Autosport International Show started 2013 off but I will back in attendance next month. Any plan I came up with unravelled pretty quickly. A lack of funding opportunities put paid to the option of going back to University to enhance my qualifications and although there was freelance work, it was low pay. The radio venture with BeeVocal ended due to their high-risk strategy which meant payment couldn’t be guaranteed. That was a shame as I really enjoyed hosting radio shows at the backend of 2012. I did write short news articles for football website A Different League but 25p per article isn’t proper payment if you ask me. One new aspect that kept me going as winter turned to spring was some work as a travel writer for Holiday-Weather.com. I had a brilliant mentor, the pay was good and the work was something completely different and out of my comfort zone. I wrote travel guides for Auckland in New Zealand, the Costa del Sol and the Costa Blanca and I really enjoyed researching and writing those pieces. The work sadly dried up by mid-May but it offered me more skills and gave me more confidence in writing for different target audiences.

The nights began to draw out but my frustrations in the job market continued in regards to finding something permanently. In February, I did have the experience of my first interview for a graduate position – a junior content editor role with Mohsen – a digital-based company based in Lancaster for mobile phone applications in their sports department. I narrowly missed out on this position due to a lack of office experience but I did well considering it was my first crack after hundreds of failed applications. Further interviews followed with two positions in Northampton and another in London but I was turned down for all roles. I seeked career guidance in May and made radical changes to covering letters and CVs. It still didn’t lead to much. By June, I was desperate and even tried to return to my former retail position at Clarks. This also ended as a dead end. I was unhappy, frightened with the lack of options and also suffering from low self-esteem. At the end of June, I decided to give it one more month before giving up and going travelling for 18 months to find my feet and possibly a future in another country. Then the opportunity arose with my current position.

Amidst the desperate tactics saw me advertising my services on Gumtree. A senior member of the team at Topps Europe Ltd saw my advert and offered me an interview for a role as a picture researcher and production assistant. The interview itself I felt wasn’t my best but I clearly did enough to impress the team. Less than 24 hours after seeing them for the interview on 2 July, I was offered the job. Unsurprisingly, I took it despite having another two interviews scheduled, one at the Phones4U Head Office in Newcastle-Upon-Lyme. I had done it finally after 14 months of sheer frustration, constant rejections and regular knockbacks.

The Topps experience started in mid-July and I went past the five-month mark last week. Working on the sports team, my role is to liaise with picture agencies, create database lists, write short content and sub-edit a subscription magazine on a variety of the licenses we have. There have been tough days but also very good days and it feels great when a project I work on comes out in the various markets. My contract was initially for three months and was extended to the end of April at the start of October. Two months later, I signed a permanent contract which I am absolutely thrilled about. Writing is my passion and always will be. Ultimately that is the job I want to do in the future when it comes to longer term ambitions but I am very happy where I am in the short term and hope to have a long and successful stint with Topps.

It was hello to the Sony Xperia Z for me this year

Of course my year wasn’t all about work and finding a position in the first place. It was a year of technology change. May saw the end for my Toshiba laptop as it went into sleep mode and never woke up! Its replacement is a HP with Windows 8.1 and I’m very happy with the choice I made. That is only the third laptop I’ve had in seven years but my mobile phone devices are now well into double figures. The BlackBerry broke again, got a replacement and then eventually traded it in well before the end of my contract. The sorriest excuse for a smartphone has been replaced by the slick Sony Xperia Z (pictured). Again this was a wise choice. The battery life isn’t brilliant but you’d be hard pushed to find a smartphone that lasts more than 2/3 days before it needs a charge nowadays.

Pictured with the world's greatest cup competition; The FA Cup

May also took me to the home of English football, though it wasn’t to see a match. I had purchased tickets to take a VIP tour of Wembley Stadium in an access all areas afternoon of one of football’s greatest arenas. I got my picture taken with the FA Cup (pictured), led a team out onto the touchline, visited the UEFA museum integrated for the Champions League final and gained access to the media rooms and England team dressing rooms. The weather was rubbish but the rest of the day was brilliant.

Friendships went through their usual course of either getting distant or staying in touch. I’m still in touch with many of my coursemates from University and that’s a nice feeling. I did learn later in the year that some people who you trust and thought were always going to be there for you no matter what, weren’t. There comes a point where you have to say enough is enough. Making effort to stay in touch shouldn’t work one-way and if it does, then you have to question the point of communication. Many people sent me messages of support when in October; the sad news came through of a passing of one of my family relatives. It was a sad time and one where I had to keep things together and not show in public that I was struggling. It wasn’t easy, far from it but by working hard throughout the weeks that followed, it was the best thing I could do to help the grief. As mentioned, I did get some lovely messages but some who I thought I could count on were not there and that hurt. Best thing to do was move on and I have.

One person who I do want to mention is Victoria Chapelow who has become one of my closest and most reliable friends of the past 12-18 months. Victoria is kind, caring, very friendly and always has been there for me. We have developed a strong bond and I’m delighted to know that I can talk to her about almost anything. We’ve seen each other a few times this year which is nice too and I hope to see more of her in 2014. Friendships are largely in a strong place then but the chances of romance have all but gone. With no experience of relationships whatsoever, I have come to the acceptance at my age now that I will never find the special one. There have been the inevitable crushes and occasionally, I have developed feelings but nothing worked out. It is sad for me to admit but there isn’t any point in pining about it. Like dying friendships, it is best to move on and not reflect on these elements too much. There will be areas where being single probably has its advantages too!

There was no foreign holiday for the second year running despite all that travel guide work at the start of the year. That drought is likely to end with a summer holiday in 2014 to somewhere hot. Saying that, you couldn’t complain too much about the British summer this year – we had a nice one for a change. In November, I went to my first football match in six years when Milton Keynes Dons met Coventry City in a League One encounter at Stadium MK. The atmosphere was very good and the stadium facilities brilliant. The local Dons team lost 3-1 but it was a good occasion to be at, especially with the Sky Blues bringing a record crowd down to MK for a League One match.

The New Year resolutions set at the start of the year ended with a mixed bag. Limited use of Facebook was stuck to, as was the paranoia effect I had – others like exercising didn’t work unless you can count walking to work on a regular basis. I was delighted that with my job, I can now support two charities with regular monthly contributions in the British Heart Foundation and Teenage Cancer Trust – two causes I value in their fantastic work. Another foundation who deserves a mention is The Big Issue and Centrepoint regarding finding homes for the homeless. The Skins actress Kathryn Prescott put on her first major photography exhibition called ‘What Makes Us Care’ in the autumn and I went to see it in September. It was a tremendous gallery of photos from a multi-talented individual and the two causes at the heart of this raised a magnificent amount of money. As time goes on, I hope to be able to donate more to other charities as I feel this is both important for my career but also because I like to help others. I also began writing a book in the summer called ‘The Premier League – Changing History.’ Progress on this halted after getting my full-time job but this is something I will start to spend more time on in the New Year and beyond. That meant the difficult but right decision to stop updating my football website last week due to the lack of available time I have.

Merry Christmas everyone!

Looking ahead to 2014 and I am settled, happier and content for the first time in ages. No predictions this time on the amount of drama but I don't think I'll need to worry about insecurity in the next 12 months. The journey to the golden sky continues.

I would also like to take the opportunity to wish all my readers and in fact everyone a Merry Christmas and a happy and prosperous New Year. This is my last piece of 2013 but Viewing Perspectives will continue into next year. There also might be a new look to this website in the future.

Thank you, Merry Christmas and you’ll hear from me soon again

Simon

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Categories: 2013, Autosport International Show, Friendship, Interview, Job, New Year, Sony Xperia Z, Topps, Tragedy, Wembley

Adapting to change and being yourself

By Simon Wright

It is a question that we have to deal with, dealing with change and sticking to your principals. However, how much do you need to change and do you need to make any compromises to fit into new surroundings, new environments and building new friendships. 

That is something I am about to express.

Character traits

As time develops, instincts get stronger and as people, we all quickly realise our strengths and weaknesses.  These can range from a type of food that has been sampled but the taste is disgusting to a personality trait that we simply can’t change.

There have been times where you get into difficult situations and you get trapped into a corner full of remorse, regret and hatred of your own characterisation.

Of course there are aspects that do change, from young age, through the often difficult teenage development and into the prime of our adulthoods.

Again that could be on a variation of levels.  It could be through a happy relationship, changing job roles on a constant basis, or falling to the often bad habit of peer pressure.

Take me as an example.  There are some character traits that I have picked up over recent years.  I would say that since 2007-2008, I am a more relaxed person, a more caring individual and I think more about others than what I ever did in my days in secondary school or before that.

This is called ‘growing up,’ an element where some of us just don’t want to do, or can’t do for whatever reason but is a part of the evolution of life.

Some things will never change, even if you want to try and change for the better.  In my case I’ve always been competitive and don’t enjoy losing at anything, whether that is in a debate or even at a computer game.  I also have a strong opinion on many features of life, but will accept and listen to both sides of the argument.  Another aspect is taking things personally and over-thinking elements of life.

It is a battle that I’ve often tried to take on and found difficult to adapt to.  However I am getting better at these aspects.  I take constructive criticism far better than I even did 12 or 24 months ago.  Admittedly though, over-thinking is probably a character trait that is part of me, and is something that just can’t be eradicated. 

Be yourself - it is far better than developing fake personalities

What I do know is I've never tried to hide anything about my personality.  I am who I am, and have found the right balance in adapting and being yourself (pictured).

Sympathy and greed

I don’t like politics that much, and when I’ve even tried to listen to policies on the news, it is difficult to pay much attention to particularly when you think of some of the current senior figures in government roles.

This is where I do feel some sympathy for our prime minister.  David Cameron has his allies, and his non-supporters who will simply disagree with everything he says, but his personality traits don’t change just because he is the occupant of the most important role in British politics.

In debates and whenever a new policy is voted or considered, Cameron simply can’t win.  He will get attacked by the leader of the opposition, will face fierce fire from some of his own backbenchers and there is then also the various groups in society and of course the inevitable media divide.  He is trying to do the best for our country, and if he just sticks to being himself and not hide behind a shell, then he will still have his strengths in politics. 

Cameron can’t help the background he came into before becoming the main man for the Conservatives after the 2005 General Election.  Sure he has made mistakes but then who hasn’t.  And it is worse if he tried to be a fake person.

This is something I simply can’t stand and despite my passion for the game, Premier League footballers fit into this equation.  The modern day professional gets stereotyped as a greedy, manipulative individual because of the simply ridiculous pay packets they get from their clubs.  You have to be good enough to make the grade, but the perks have now gone into the realms of fantasy.

You do get your good guys in football, just like in any other form of life.  The recently retired Paul Scholes and Jamie Carragher were tremendous role models for kids, as you rarely saw them get into any antics off-the-field that put their reputations in jeopardy.  Others like former England skipper John Terry are not a good role model for the youth of today’s generation.

Another player who it is difficult to find too much sympathy for is Manchester United striker Wayne Rooney.  The England international is reportedly unhappy at Old Trafford once again, and news organisations have seen it to be so important they class it as ‘news.’  It isn’t news, when was Rooney last happy?  Unless he scores an important goal, Rooney is just about as likely as comedian Jack Dee to have a smile on their face.

Plus when you earn the money like he does, he should think about his situation.  Imagine what it is like for the everyday person, even those who work really hard to try and find a job, but constantly get frustrated by rejected applications.  Personally I've always believed Rooney is one of football’s most over-rated players of recent times.  He has produced moments of quality, but to earn the money he does per week for only occasional flashes of brilliance boggles the mind.  

Rooney is the best example I can think of being a fake individual.  He kicks a football, looks like a miserable person most of the time and is somehow idolised by kids all over the land.  That I think is slightly concerning.  It is people like him which put some off following football and rightly so.  My love of the game won’t change, but I would rather praise and respect our brave soldiers sacrificing their lives for our country than worship a Premier League footballer earning more than £200,000 a week!

Be ready to adapt, but don’t change completely

In my circumstances, I have entered many new environments and phases.  This Tuesday is the fourth anniversary of the most traumatic experience of my life.  On the way home from a night out in my hometown in July 2009, I was attacked by a gang of youths.

My injuries were fortunately light to what it could have been.  On another instance and another night, I could easily have been another statistic.  Though the scars have mentally healed, some of the psychological parts of this will never go away because it is not something you can easily forget.

I had to make changes to myself after this, and while it is no good to sit depressed in a corner and watch the world go by, I had to adapt to not taking so many risks.  I developed a cautious approach to many elements of my life, and it is one thing I’m glad I’ve done.  Sometimes it might not be the right way to approach things, but it is a safer and easier way to for me to live my life.

The one main lesson I took from that night was to understand that every second of my life is precious now and not to take everything for granted.  Sure the extra aspects such as fast cars, a load of cash, and all the flashiest jewellery that can be bought are lovely accessories to have, but I’d trade all of that in when it comes between choosing between security and fortune. 

I’m happy as long as I have a roof over my head, clothes to wear, food to eat, support from friends and family and some form of daily income.  With my recent new position having started last week, I can say all of these boxes are safely ticked.  Some of us are not so lucky, especially in far lesser developed countries in the world.

When it comes to personality and characterisation of yourself, I believe you must be prepared to adapt in certain situations.  However don’t lose all of the principles that make you the person you really are.  Happiness is more important than progressing up the career ladder, but feeling sad and sorry along the way.

There is no need to change as a person completely.  Having a fake personality will win no friends.  Just be strong in difficult situations, and be yourself.  Have a flexible approach but stick to the majority of your own principles in life.

Categories: Competitive, David Cameron, Environment, Fake, Friendship, Jack Dee, Premier League, Prime Minister, Relationships, Strength

Recovering from setbacks

I can probably speak for many that life isn’t plain-sailing.  Nor should it be.  You would have to be the luckiest person in the world to have the perfect everything.

If you do have the perfect job, the perfect marriage, the perfect family and friends, and the perfect bank balance, then congratulations for being such a lucky devil. 

I don’t mean that in a bad way either, I just prefer those who have to work exceptionally hard to get where they are today, rather than see success just handed out on a plate.

Plus, it is important to recover from setbacks and take the positives out of experiences – otherwise we don’t improve as individuals.

That could be a record deal that has turned sour, a football transfer move that went wrong, or something as simple as a rejection which could mean the end of the world.

The reality is it isn’t.  New avenues can open up, and for every crushing disappointment – there’s a cloud in a silver lining.

For me, I’ve had a couple of experiences where I have had this and reacted in different ways.  One was on an educational scale, and one was on the never ending job search lately. 

On both occasions, I took the positives from this shattering setbacks and feel that improvements can and will be made.  After all, that is the only way we improve as individuals.  Self-assessment doesn’t have to be taxing as one advert used to say.

Unfair but made sense

It was the autumn of 2001, and the world was only just coming to terms with the shocking terrorist attack on America on September 11^th, and the air strikes that had got underway in Afghanistan – a country that our brave and strong troops are still serving in today.

In my own personal life, I had just started at secondary school – a massive change after four years at the same middle school.

I remember the start of my first year there (Year 8), and it was a real wake-up call.  The high amount of levels in homework was absolutely ridiculous.  I wasn’t prepared for such a change, and some of the lessons were demanding too.

It was a packed curriculum at the time.  Not only did you have the basics of English, Maths and Science to cope with, there were lessons in French, I.C.T, R.S, Geography, History, Music, Food Technology, P.E, Drama and Art.  You could see how easy it was for me to be confused!

Sometimes, phrases in pictures speak louder than words in general

Anyway I still thought I was managing the situation okay, until in October – six weeks after the first term began.  The school changed the timetables around and I was put in a lower group of study.  It was called Route 2 as I recall at the time.

Not only was I going to be separated from the friendship network I was building up, it felt like an insult to my intelligence.  I’m not the smartest tool in the box, but I couldn’t fathom why I wasn’t good enough to not be in a higher group. 

I’ve always wanted to challenge myself, and felt this was a massive misjudgement from my secondary school.

I went home that night in floods of tears.  I don’t think I’ve been more devastated than I was that Friday evening in my education history, apart from GCSE results day.  I didn’t care about what people were saying to me that this wasn’t the end of my hopes for the future. 

All I wanted to do was crawl underneath something and stay there.  Half-term was around the corner, so it didn’t matter.

I felt I was considered as a total failure and a write-off.  Those who know me will agree that I have often shown a dramatic side to my personality.

Ultimately, it was the best thing that could have happened to me.  Although I had to deal with a stalking problem from a fellow student who nobody liked, dropping to a lower level meant I was able to cope with the workload much better.

I worked hard, got some decent end-of-year exam results and at the end of the year – got my promotion back to a higher tier of study for Year 9. 

My initial reaction was one of pain, hurt and anger.  In the long run, everything worked out through some hard work, more determination and a stronger side to me that I had probably been lacking in education upto that point.

Taking the positives out of the disappointment

On Monday this week, I got the news I wasn’t hoping for.  I had been turned down for a job I had applied for in media.

It was my first media interview since graduating from the University of Northampton last summer.  All those application rejections, ignored e-mails and unpaid experiences that had turned sour finally had a point.

I don’t want to say too much about the role I was going for, except it would have meant relocation from my current base to the north of England. 

Also, it was an entry level position and one where I felt I met all of the job specifications in the criteria.

I had the interview last week, and felt I did very well.  I was nervous on the day, but I didn’t show it.  I spoke confidently, showed my problem solving skills, explained what I had done before and undergone a written assessment of a high standard.

I left the venue and the area feeling that I had done all that I could.  I couldn’t have done anymore to be honest, and at the end of the day – that’s all you can do in any given situation.

The position was always going to be fiercely competitive, and it ended up going to an individual with more experience in an office environment.

That is no reflection on me, and the feedback I got was very positive.  Sure, I was very disappointed with the outcome.  Who wouldn’t be in that situation, but the experience I’ve taken from this is valuable.

With a degree of luck, I hope it won’t be long before the big breakthrough happens for me.  It’s no good stuffing your face with chocolate and sitting in a corner staring into space.  That’s the quitting option – and that is not an option for yours truly.

If something doesn’t quite go the way you want it to go, it is important to learn from your setbacks and become stronger for them, otherwise we don’t become better people at the end of the day.

Categories: Autumn, Bank, English, Friendship, GCSEs, Job, Life, Marriage, Maths, Media