Adapting to change and being yourself

By Simon Wright

It is a question that we have to deal with, dealing with change and sticking to your principals. However, how much do you need to change and do you need to make any compromises to fit into new surroundings, new environments and building new friendships. 

That is something I am about to express.

Character traits

As time develops, instincts get stronger and as people, we all quickly realise our strengths and weaknesses.  These can range from a type of food that has been sampled but the taste is disgusting to a personality trait that we simply can’t change.

There have been times where you get into difficult situations and you get trapped into a corner full of remorse, regret and hatred of your own characterisation.

Of course there are aspects that do change, from young age, through the often difficult teenage development and into the prime of our adulthoods.

Again that could be on a variation of levels.  It could be through a happy relationship, changing job roles on a constant basis, or falling to the often bad habit of peer pressure.

Take me as an example.  There are some character traits that I have picked up over recent years.  I would say that since 2007-2008, I am a more relaxed person, a more caring individual and I think more about others than what I ever did in my days in secondary school or before that.

This is called ‘growing up,’ an element where some of us just don’t want to do, or can’t do for whatever reason but is a part of the evolution of life.

Some things will never change, even if you want to try and change for the better.  In my case I’ve always been competitive and don’t enjoy losing at anything, whether that is in a debate or even at a computer game.  I also have a strong opinion on many features of life, but will accept and listen to both sides of the argument.  Another aspect is taking things personally and over-thinking elements of life.

It is a battle that I’ve often tried to take on and found difficult to adapt to.  However I am getting better at these aspects.  I take constructive criticism far better than I even did 12 or 24 months ago.  Admittedly though, over-thinking is probably a character trait that is part of me, and is something that just can’t be eradicated. 

Be yourself - it is far better than developing fake personalities

What I do know is I've never tried to hide anything about my personality.  I am who I am, and have found the right balance in adapting and being yourself (pictured).

Sympathy and greed

I don’t like politics that much, and when I’ve even tried to listen to policies on the news, it is difficult to pay much attention to particularly when you think of some of the current senior figures in government roles.

This is where I do feel some sympathy for our prime minister.  David Cameron has his allies, and his non-supporters who will simply disagree with everything he says, but his personality traits don’t change just because he is the occupant of the most important role in British politics.

In debates and whenever a new policy is voted or considered, Cameron simply can’t win.  He will get attacked by the leader of the opposition, will face fierce fire from some of his own backbenchers and there is then also the various groups in society and of course the inevitable media divide.  He is trying to do the best for our country, and if he just sticks to being himself and not hide behind a shell, then he will still have his strengths in politics. 

Cameron can’t help the background he came into before becoming the main man for the Conservatives after the 2005 General Election.  Sure he has made mistakes but then who hasn’t.  And it is worse if he tried to be a fake person.

This is something I simply can’t stand and despite my passion for the game, Premier League footballers fit into this equation.  The modern day professional gets stereotyped as a greedy, manipulative individual because of the simply ridiculous pay packets they get from their clubs.  You have to be good enough to make the grade, but the perks have now gone into the realms of fantasy.

You do get your good guys in football, just like in any other form of life.  The recently retired Paul Scholes and Jamie Carragher were tremendous role models for kids, as you rarely saw them get into any antics off-the-field that put their reputations in jeopardy.  Others like former England skipper John Terry are not a good role model for the youth of today’s generation.

Another player who it is difficult to find too much sympathy for is Manchester United striker Wayne Rooney.  The England international is reportedly unhappy at Old Trafford once again, and news organisations have seen it to be so important they class it as ‘news.’  It isn’t news, when was Rooney last happy?  Unless he scores an important goal, Rooney is just about as likely as comedian Jack Dee to have a smile on their face.

Plus when you earn the money like he does, he should think about his situation.  Imagine what it is like for the everyday person, even those who work really hard to try and find a job, but constantly get frustrated by rejected applications.  Personally I've always believed Rooney is one of football’s most over-rated players of recent times.  He has produced moments of quality, but to earn the money he does per week for only occasional flashes of brilliance boggles the mind.  

Rooney is the best example I can think of being a fake individual.  He kicks a football, looks like a miserable person most of the time and is somehow idolised by kids all over the land.  That I think is slightly concerning.  It is people like him which put some off following football and rightly so.  My love of the game won’t change, but I would rather praise and respect our brave soldiers sacrificing their lives for our country than worship a Premier League footballer earning more than £200,000 a week!

Be ready to adapt, but don’t change completely

In my circumstances, I have entered many new environments and phases.  This Tuesday is the fourth anniversary of the most traumatic experience of my life.  On the way home from a night out in my hometown in July 2009, I was attacked by a gang of youths.

My injuries were fortunately light to what it could have been.  On another instance and another night, I could easily have been another statistic.  Though the scars have mentally healed, some of the psychological parts of this will never go away because it is not something you can easily forget.

I had to make changes to myself after this, and while it is no good to sit depressed in a corner and watch the world go by, I had to adapt to not taking so many risks.  I developed a cautious approach to many elements of my life, and it is one thing I’m glad I’ve done.  Sometimes it might not be the right way to approach things, but it is a safer and easier way to for me to live my life.

The one main lesson I took from that night was to understand that every second of my life is precious now and not to take everything for granted.  Sure the extra aspects such as fast cars, a load of cash, and all the flashiest jewellery that can be bought are lovely accessories to have, but I’d trade all of that in when it comes between choosing between security and fortune. 

I’m happy as long as I have a roof over my head, clothes to wear, food to eat, support from friends and family and some form of daily income.  With my recent new position having started last week, I can say all of these boxes are safely ticked.  Some of us are not so lucky, especially in far lesser developed countries in the world.

When it comes to personality and characterisation of yourself, I believe you must be prepared to adapt in certain situations.  However don’t lose all of the principles that make you the person you really are.  Happiness is more important than progressing up the career ladder, but feeling sad and sorry along the way.

There is no need to change as a person completely.  Having a fake personality will win no friends.  Just be strong in difficult situations, and be yourself.  Have a flexible approach but stick to the majority of your own principles in life.

Categories: Competitive, David Cameron, Environment, Fake, Friendship, Jack Dee, Premier League, Prime Minister, Relationships, Strength